"I like mine with lettuce and tomato
Heinz 57 and french fried potatoes
Big kosher pickle and a cold draft beer
Well good God almighty which way do I steer ..."
--Cheeseburger in Paradise by Jimmy Buffett
After more than three years of committing myself to a vegetarian diet, I am back to eating meat. On Wednesday night, I had chicken flautas at one of our favorite Mexican restaurants. And last night, I ate a hamburger. Both were delicious, and I'm not quite sure how to feel about that. During these two chow-downs, my taste buds and stomach were mighty pleased, but my heart and my head felt guilty.
But it's something that I had to do for my health. I was not a good vegetarian. I did not eat tofu and soy and beans to make up for the protein I was lacking from not eating meat. I would go several days in a row just eating pastas and cereals and vegetables. If I did get any protein, it was usually in the form of a protein shake or meal-replacement bar. Those things are so loaded with all kinds of other artificial stuff. I just don't think their protein is the same as protein from a natural source. All this was taking a toll.
I've noticed for quite awhile that my hair doesn't grow. Then almost two months ago, I scraped my pinkie finger on my right hand. I'm looking at it right now--as I type this--and there's still a visible mark there where it hasn't completely healed. I burned myself two weeks ago--just a minor mishap--and the wound still looks horrible.
So we'll see how it goes now that I'm moving to a true, balanced diet. Something tells me--as much as I hate to admit it--that I'll feel much better and much more energetic. I felt more satisfied after eating that burger last night than I've felt in months. I didn't feel dog-tired by 8:00 p.m.--like I usually do--and I didn't have any late-night cravings.
I'm trying not to blame myself too much for caving in on something that was important to me. And I'm hoping that my guilty conscience will go away soon.
